Word: adame
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...When Adam Cohen asked if he could try to steal my identity for a cover story, all I thought was, "Good career move." If I could persuade other staff members to join the program, I could transition from writer to subject, and get my name in the magazine every week without doing any work...
...then I started to worry. What exactly would Adam be looking at? Would he know how much I made, and would he tell other people, who would then make fun of me? Could he see all those cookie things in my home computer, and could he tell which were the, um, mature sites I was looking at and which were the kinky sites that were just pop-ups that wouldn't let me click off them? And would he buy that excuse...
...dumb part about agreeing to this is, not only does Adam give me the creeps, but also I should have learned my lesson, because someone I didn't know had already stolen my identity. At first I just kind of vaguely noticed that I wasn't getting my American Express bills anymore, which at the time just seemed like a good thing. Then I got a call from the AmEx fraud department asking me about some charges on my Optima card. I had never used my Optima card. It's just one of many credit cards I ordered because...
...fact, since AmEx wouldn't tell me what happened with its investigation, I'm still rooting for the other me to outrun the AmEx cops. He's tough, he's a world traveler, he's frugal, and I'm pretty sure he can help me take care of Adam Cohen if Adam ever tries to break into my home computer...
...Later that day I got a qualified thank-you e-mail from student Adam Riff, who invited me to hang out with a dozen friends in his parents' living room, where they tried to make me feel better. "We all enjoyed watching the principal squirm and turn red in the face," Adam offered. I was also told I was in good company because Star Trek Voyager's LeVar Burton spoke last year...