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...there's one problem: retelling the same joke 30 times isn't very funny. The playing-off music isn't always properly timed and the preceding video footage is almost always more entertaining than the cat (especially the one with the guest who passes out on Glen Beck). After you watch one video, the others are mildly entertaining at best. The Internet clearly disagrees with me here, what with the ongoing popularity of Rickrolling, but I stand by my opinion. Jokes are only funny when they're original, when they take you in a direction you didn't expect...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: Play Him Off, Keyboard Cat | 5/11/2009 | See Source »

...recession. If that does not happen, the average citizen will lose what has been his last, best hope for having a reasonable economic life instead of living through a multi-year period of national financial stagnation and intransigent, high unemployment. It will be a world in which almost no one believes that his life will ever improve...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: The Economy Moves to the Waiting Room | 5/11/2009 | See Source »

...Almost lost amidst all the headlines about crisis aid to the automakers, the U.S. Department of Energy is now preparing to release $25 billion in loans appropriated last autumn to speed up the transition to more fuel efficient vehicles. The cash is supposed to be used for specific projects that increase fuel economy. Ford, for example, has applied to use some of the federal cash to convert an assembly plant in suburban Detroit from building trucks to building small cars and electric vehicles. The project costs $550 million and Ford hopes to use some of the DOE cash. GM, Chrysler...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: Adding Up the Auto Bailout: $80 Billion and Growing | 5/11/2009 | See Source »

...decided from Day 1 that we were going to turn things around this year.”Upon reaching the final heats, both first varsity boats faced stiff competition.The heavyweights found themselves in a fierce three-way battle with Wisconsin and Brown. While Harvard outpaced the Badgers by almost two seconds, its 5:42.625 finish was not enough to gain an edge over the Bears. Brown’s first boat gave its Crimson counterpart trouble in the crews’ first meeting of the season, finishing just a second behind Harvard in a dual meet. Yesterday, the Bears quickly...

Author: By Loren Amor, CRIMSON STAFF WRITER | Title: Top Boats Settle for Second in Worcester | 5/10/2009 | See Source »

What's going to happen to the tank? The Pentagon's 70-ton Abrams may be battle-tested and almost iconic but perhaps not as important to the kinds of fluid, counter-insurgencies the U.S. has been waging recently. At the same time, however, the Pentagon's latest budget proposal has just cancelled what was once a more future-looking program that would have developed 27-ton vehicles with lightweight armor and the ability to fire GPS-guided shells...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: At the Pentagon, It's Tanks, But No Tanks | 5/10/2009 | See Source »

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