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...Jerky Scare of aught-five has the global carving board been more barren. Mad cow, foot-and-mouth and a host of unpalatable soy substitutes have left Type A red-meat lovers forlorn in the produce aisle, desperately trying to assemble a meal from legumes and kasha. Now, resourceful amateur butchers around the globe are proffering alternatives to the traditional Sunday roast. In Bucharest last week, public authorities plastered the city with posters telling consumers how to spot the difference between a leg of lamb and a leg of dog. (Check for paws...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: Starting Time | 4/23/2001 | See Source »

...October, Karachi police received reports that a mummy was being offered for sale to "big foreigners," including an unidentified ambassador. A 50-minute amateur video of the mummy, with a 1990 date stamp, featured close-ups of its gold crown and breastplate. The asking price: $10 million. The possession of antiquities older than 50 years is a crime in Pakistan, as is their forgery; Karachi's deputy superintendent of police, Muhammad Farooq Awan, arrested the video's distributor, who led police to Quetta, Baluchistan's rugged provincial capital. There, Awan and his team raided the home of Wali Muhammad Reeki...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: Mummy Not So Dearest | 4/23/2001 | See Source »

...Ever since FDR laid out the first installment of his New Deal, every President has had to pass the 100-days test; Bush's 100th falls on Sunday, April 29. Rove, an autodidact and amateur historian, insists that presidents should be judged on a 180-day timetable, since the legislative calendar follows one. That theory won't stop the barrage of analysis that will begin this week, so, to feed the media beast, Rove and Hughes met with GOP surrogates in the Old Executive Office Building last Thursday to hand out a script. The central message: Bush will not overhype...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: The Busiest Man in the White House | 4/22/2001 | See Source »

...Honestly, I was almost never born. Maman left the hospital with me still in her womb.” As the youngest of triplets, baby Matapari, whose name means “trouble,” is an anomaly in his village. The midwife and local amateur mystic suspects he is a vengeful ancestor reincarnate, while the town priest stages an exorcism on the baby...

Author: By Maria-helene V. Wagenberg, CONTRIBUTING WRITER | Title: That’s What Little Boys Are Made Of | 4/20/2001 | See Source »

...discouraged? Is it that League of Nations fiasco they told us about in eighth grade? Or the farcical fecklessness of the United Nations? Fuhgettaboutit. This time around we’ll get it right; since we won’t be relying on run-of-the-mill, amateur Joe Soldiers but actual specialized Peacekeepers, we can respectfully conflict-manage and dialogue on, what ho! till the cows come home. We will specialize in making our safe havens safe, as secure as the sturdiest Swiss vault. Just not like Srebrenica, you understand...

Author: By Boleslaw Z. Kabala, | Title: Editor's Notebook: The Sacred Duty of Copping Out | 4/19/2001 | See Source »

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