Word: arctics
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While endeavoring to light a fire in our sub-Arctic common room, however, we were laid low by the image of the Canaanite deity Baal, son of El, come forth in all his crimson glory. He informed us that the answer to our problems lay within the body of knowledge we had accumulated over the past four years. Idol worship, he boomed, is the only way to regenerate Harvard, and indeed modern society as a whole...
John Miri '98 of Matthews Hall dealt with the Arctic conditions with a more efficient system: selective memory. When asked over the phone what creative ways he used to stay warm, he answered, "I think you have the wrong number." Reminded again about the lack of heat, he responded, "Oh yeah, I guess we didn't have heat for a while. I guess I blocked...
...name-recognition peak sometimearound when our parents were developing theirfirst crushes. Every good American kid wasfamiliar with the Necco wafer; priests placed thethin pastel discs on the tongues of childrenpracticing communion. Byrd brought the wafers tothe South Pole, and Macmillan took packages ofthem on his trip to the Arctic. Necco'shoneycomb/peanut Bolster Bar preceded the BartSimpson-famed Butterfinger. Upon the 1938launching of the Skybar, "a candy box in a bar,"skywriters and low-flying planes with trailingbanner-advertisements circled most of theNortheast. Necco also erected an enormous Skybarbillboard in Times Square, complete with enoughflashing lights to rival the Coke sign...
...that consumption of foreign oil has exceeded that of domestically produced oil. Imports reached 8.9 million bbl. per day, eclipsing by 109,000 bbl. per day the previous import record, set in 1977. Lobbyists are expected to use the statistics to pressure Congress to allow oil drilling in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge in Alaska...
More pragmatically, a continuing military debacle in the northern Caucasus might not only push the core area of Russia back into a police state but also trigger additional declarations of independence throughout the ethnically and culturally varied Russian Federation. That could plunge the vast area stretching from the Arctic Ocean south to the Black Sea and from the Baltic enclave of Kaliningrad clear across Eurasia to the North Pacific into chaos or civil war. At the most extreme, some Western analysts are whispering again a phrase last heard in 1991, when the Soviet Union was breaking up: "Yugoslavia with nukes...