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Harvard has also made its way onto UrbanDictionary.com. Not unexpectedly, the definitions are polarized. One insult by a user called Funkmaster is followed by an ardent defense from Funkmasterisretarded: “Harvard: Where turds like Funkmaster wish they could go so that they don’t have to clean shum for a living.” Shum, the dictionary reports, is “a mixture of shit...

Author: By Rena Xu, CRIMSON STAFF WRITER | Title: De Fizzle Your Wizzle | 2/12/2004 | See Source »

...once talked of earth-shaking malletted tones now talk of “gong-related program activities.” Forget Kirkland—did any Houses in the region have functioning gongs ready to resound at any interhouse interloper within seconds, as has been claimed by the most ardent hawks? The more time passes, the more it seems like Mather is only after the DeWolfe apartments, now occupied by Kirkland affiliates, that it mentioned in its declaration...

Author: By The Crimson Staff, | Title: For Whom Was the Gong Stolen? | 2/6/2004 | See Source »

Depressing bridal planners and tabloid photographers but relieving the rest of the free world, the celebrated celebrity courtship known as Bennifer has at long last come to an end. The ardent red-carpet romance sparked on the 2002 set of their dud Gigli seemed to lose its luster after JENNIFER LOPEZ and BEN AFFLECK called off their September 2003 nuptials amid frenzied media coverage. When Lopez was spied partying with P. Diddy at a Miami nightclub in January, rumors swirled that the exes would reunite. By last week, Lopez's spokesman was confirming that Jen and Ben were done. Bennifer...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: Jen & Ben On The Block | 2/2/2004 | See Source »

According to recent news reports, Ralph Nader is now in the process of deciding whether to seek the presidency for the third time in as many election cycles. While discussing the possibility of making another run for the White House, the longtime consumer advocate and ardent critic of the Bush administration described Democrats as “unwilling to go all out to stop the destructive tax cuts for the wealthy,” saying that “they have been soft on corporate crime. They have gone along in almost every issue except judicial appointments. They have cowered...

Author: By Adam T. Thomas, | Title: Sit This One Out, Ralph | 1/21/2004 | See Source »

...knew that Howard Dean was such a sugar-tongued swain? Al Gore's televised "I do" last week (not to be confused with Trista and Ryan's more lavish and much higher-rated nuptials) was the culmination of a secret but ardent yearlong courtship by Dean. Yes, it may be a marriage of convenience, but the hushed backroom cell-phone calls, the clandestine visits, the little apercus of agreement on global warming are all part of a modern political romance novel. Apparently the doctor has a bedside manner after all. But the relationship did not really get serious until Gore...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: Campaign '04: Thanks, Al. I'll Take It From Here | 12/22/2003 | See Source »

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