Word: asses
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...boxer, complete with adoring fans, members of the press and a Don King-like moderator, is really a parole hearing. Perfect ironic timing: Milhouse tells Bart he can't play with him any more because his mother thinks Bart's a bad influence, and Bart replies "Bad influence my ass! How many times have I told you not to listen to your mother...
...fantastical: four bored soldiers, AWOL with a hum-vee, searching for buried treasure. With the grizzled Major Archie Gates (George Clooney), a disillusioned officer leading their illicit adventure, these swashbucklers embark upon their search for hidden Kuwaiti gold led by a secret map concealed in a captured Iraqi's ass, affectionately dubbed "the ass map," with a duffell bag filled with grenade rigged nerf footballs. Denied any of the war's action, these four soldiers enthusiastically seek their last chance to blow things up, now that the war is officially over. Russell goes out of his way to emphasize that...
...studio, Hardknox puts together an energetic album that entertains and moves with raging rhythms, raps, grooves and tunes whose careful and expert blending make them cutting-edge but still strangely familiar. While the band (Lindy Layton and Steve P.) is determined to market its album and image as bad-ass and in-your-face, one can't help but be amused by the nasal, child-like voices that punctuate tracks such as "Coz I Can," "Fire Like This" and "Attitude" with phrases like, "There's no school tougher than Hardknox." Such youthful cries of liberation and power with the infusion...
...were not the only workers here. Forget the Dixie Chicks as a symbol of kick-ass country or folk. Squeezing into the sappily labeled side show, "Small Victory: Songs of Faith and Redemption," I discovered a batch of female folk artists who, even in their sometimes cliched anguish over lost love, came out as women who knew the value and pain of an honest day's labor. All too ready to dismiss this as another whine-fest on my way in, I instead was caught up with the crowd in wildly applauding the willowy Dee Carstensen strumming her harp siren...
...five numbskulls with seven-string guitars and fake dread-locks, and you know what, you've got a band? You put some goofy white boy in big baggy pants and take him out to the tattoo shop, you've got another band. You take two lazy fat-ass pieces of white trash from [lousy] Detroit and put clown makeup on them and you've got another band. It's not [really] music. I'm sorry, but you know what--I can get a seven string guitar, I can tune it down two steps and play with some bass guitar effects...