Word: awkwardnesses
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...Idol is a makeover show. The audience likes to see nerds turned cool, frumps turned glam and awkward kids finding their legs onstage. And it likes to see itself as the invisible hand guiding the changes. A narrative makes the audience feel invested, the same way movie fans do in Brad and Angelina. "The journey of seeing the same people coming back week on week-you have a relationship with them," says creator Simon Fuller. "You don't know what's going to happen. Sanjaya walks out with his crazy hairdo. It's a living soap opera." Season 6 contestant...
...cell phones, iPods, gameboys and the Internet. We're using them to chat with people we've never met who don't even use their real names. We're typing things like LOL, c u later, and using a parenthesis and a colon to demonstrate joy, which I find awkward and desensitizing. I'm not an old fashioned guy, but the subtext is that over time it's possible that we may get so clad in electronics and isolation and distance and desensitization that we will not only lose our innocence, but we won't even think we need...
...your 12 personalities. Threaten to sue if the insensitive bastards say no. 10) Pull the fire alarm in Annenberg—jack some shirts during the confusion. Multiple alarms may be necessary. 11) Pretend like you know the person handing out the t-shirts and make them feel really awkward for not remembering your name. They’ll probably feel too guilty to not give you a shirt. 12) Freshwomen: Chat up the guys—it’s okay to accept t-shirts...you can’t roofie cotton. 13) Freshmen: You’re still...
...butter-bodies (see Bell Lap 1), or joining student groups that celebrate every stereotype you spent your high-school years trying to avoid (see every minority group on campus). No matter how much wisdom butter Harvard students rub on themselves, social interactions will be as insufficiently lubricated as the awkward snakebite-style handjobs you and your roommate exchanged last night. There’s a good solution to this, but Stillman Infirmary limits “vacations” to a week in length. So just give up, surrender, and enjoy the gayest day of your life. FOOTNOTES: 1. Blockstab...
...case of final club exclusivity, not getting an invitation to a party may be kind of crappy, but it is hardly indicative of widespread social malaise. If anything, it’s just a symptom of what we already knew about Harvard students: many of them are pretty socially awkward. It should not be a surprise that a great chunk of them haven’t gotten over a middle school model of social interactions...