Word: axle
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...that album’s unforgettable first track. Two decades and four albums later, the band has hit its nadir. “Chinese Democracy,” their first album of original songs in 17 years, is thoroughly forgettable, neither worth the wait nor the $13 million-plus Axl Rose and company spent on its production. The whole thing is overproduced, every song a too-many-cooks-in-the-kitchen kind of affair. Much has been made about the decline of rock at the hands of Pro Tools, but a monkey could have mixed this album better with GarageBand...
...what's the band been doing? Breaking up mostly. The current lineup has just one original member, Axl Rose. The rest, including guitar savant Slash, departed years ago, presumably too intrigued by the Internet and other human advances to stay locked up in a recording studio with their famously controlling singer. Rose, once as blond and lithe as a stalk of wheat, has suffered the pudgification of middle age and burned through a reported $14 million in production costs, making Chinese Democracy the most expensive record in history. But given the cruelty with which pop culture devours its celebrity eccentrics...
...PEPPER sticking by promise to give free soda to everyone in America if AXL ROSE releases Chinese Democracy before...
...nine tracks Skwerl put on his site were pretty exciting (you have not fully rocked until you've heard Axl Rose give it to Hu Jintao: "Blame it on the Falun Gong!/ They've seen the end, and you can't hold on now!"). But they weren't as exciting as talking to Skwerl. Until our conversation, I didn't really understand how piracy worked. Unfortunately, before he could explain, I had to interrupt to get to the bottom of this "Skwerl" thing. After bottle-nursing an injured squirrel back to health in high school and taking...
...back a very professional e-mail saying it's down, sorry for any inconvenience, and tried to do damage control." After 14 years of waiting, the record-company execs were not planning to launch the album with 10 minutes on a blog. I'm guessing they wanted to get Axl a whole hour on The View...