Word: bacons
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Dates: during 1970-1979
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Crimson sixth man Mark Panarese, a sophomore, defeated his opponent by a 3-1 margin, while Ned Bacon met an excellent player and, despite playing well, succumbed...
...opening lines included quotations from Philosopher Francis Bacon and Quarterback Johnny Unites, as well as a no-nonsense warning that was pure Howard Cosell. "I am not here to entertain you. We're here to work," the broadcaster rasped at the 18 students (out of 200 applicants) who had won seats for his twelve-week seminar on "BigTime Sports in Contemporary America" at Yale University. Humble Howard's course will include guest lectures by National Football League Commissioner Pete Rozelle and Baseball Players' Negotiator Marvin Miller, plus readings from classic texts like Cosell's own autobiography...
Peter Havens applied the screws to his adversary, racking up the largest overall point spread of the day. Sixth and seventh seeds Mark Panarese and Ned Bacon also turned in flawless gems, putting the whammy on the Big Green in straight sets...
...Crimson may have "swept away" this contest, as Ned Bacon phrased it, but the squad entwines a Princeton club on February 7 that will not be such a lark. Princeton is bristling with racquet talent but the Crimson hope to humble the Tigers with their well-honed array of drop shots, reverse corners, and three-wall nicks...
...burst of publicity about the Loch Ness Monster has inspired others to track it down. Nature, with a straight face, reported that the British Bacon Curers' Federation would soon organize a new hunt for Nessie by hot-air balloon. The organization's choice of conveyance is appropriate. The opinions of the Nessie experts alone are enough to keep the hunters airborne for weeks...