Word: baldly
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...Pearson's second novel begins, "That was the summer we lost the bald Jeeter who was not even mostly Jeeter anymore but was probably mostly Throckmorton or anyway was probably considered mostly Throckmorton which was an appreciable step up from being considered mostly Jeeter since Jeeters hadn't ever been anything much while Throckmortons had in fact been something once . . ." This opening sentence runs on for 353 more words...
...credit, Pearson gives fair warning that his story is going to take some time in the unraveling and may indeed be more fun for the teller than the audience. While the death of the bald Jeeter is announced smack in the opening, the sad event is inched up on through a series of digressions, including one on the deterioration of the widow Mrs. Askew's drains and downspouts. Not until page 57 is the bald Jeeter laid to rest in the local cemetery of the fictional Neely, N.C., at which time it begins to become clear that the deceased...
...novel's hero, of a sort, turns out to be Benton Lynch, nephew of the bald Jeeter, son of the fat Jeeter, and a lad who "could not ever rise much above cipherdom." The author, of course, elaborates: "He was not blatantly stupid or outright idiotic. There was not anything blatant or outright about him, not anything at all. He mostly simply was not." What Benton does possess, it turns out, is a taste for armed robbery and a lecherous hankering after Jane Elizabeth Firesheets, who is willing to overlook his myriad inadequacies for the thrill of sharing a life...
...turns out that minoxidil can indeed grow hair, but it rarely produces a robust crop. It works best on the scalps of men who are just beginning to go bald, especially those in their early 20s. Only a fraction of the nation's millions of balding men meet those criteria. This limited efficacy is borne out by Upjohn-sponsored tests at 27 centers around the country. According to the company, 76% of the men using a solution that was 2% minoxidil showed evidence of new hair growth after a year. That was the assessment of researchers who regularly counted...
...named Beaujean came to the same dead end as Marcos with his Swiss gold and his ruined kidneys. "He owned amazing gardens," the historian Miriam Beard wrote of Beaujean, "but he was too fat to walk in them . . . He had countless splendid bedrooms and suffered from insomnia . . . a monstrous, bald, bloated old man in a bed sculptured and painted to resemble a gilded basket of roses...