Word: bawl
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This year's Bawl Street Journal, annual Manhattan Bond Club parody of the marmoreal Wall Street Journal, tried hard last week to keep its cracks aimed below Canal Street. But its 14,000 Wall Street-wise chuckled most over an advertisement which read: "DEAL WITH US: No Restrictions, No Holds Barred, No Legal Opinions, No Balance Sheet, No Income Account: U. S. GOV'T BOND DEPARTMENT...
...General Strike. In front of his official residence, No. 10 Downing St., they chant: "The King is right, Baldwin is wrong!" They march on to sing: For He's a Jolly Good Fellow! in front of empty Buckingham Palace. They swing around into Piccadilly and at No. 145 bawl loud enough for the Duke & Duchess of York to hear: "Stand by him! We want King Edward! Perish the politicians...
...probably followed by Saturday." Lead story concerned a Federal resettlement project. "Twelve hundred inhabitants of Alaska's Yukon Valley, discouraged by the failure of gold mines in the vicinity, yesterday arrived in New York City and began colonizing the vast wastes of the Empire State Building," related the Bawl Street Journal. "By nine o'clock last night all the pioneers had staked out claims on the plateau-like stretches between the fortieth and eightieth parallel. Little watch fires gleamed in hundreds of windows while hungry bond and insurance salesmen prowled below on Fifth Avenue, snarling and pointing menacingly...
...large part of the Bawl Street Journal was devoted to fabulous Washington doings. After five hours of questioning Secretary of the Treasury Morgenthau had admitted investing all available Government funds in common stocks while the Administration boosted business at every turn. "Wrecksford" Tugwell had suggested selling short and continuing present policies but had been overruled...
Using its constitutional right to fix standards of weight & measure, Congress changed the year from 365 days to 1,000, thus dispensing with elections for a long time. The tax year, however, was reduced to 200 days. Gaily oblivious to its other stories on the Treasury, the Bawl Street Journal also declared that Secretary Morgenthau hoped to balance the budget by having the Government pay a 50% income tax on its own income. "Certainly a 50% increase in income will silence all our critics," Mr. Morgenthau was reported as saying. "True, there may be loopholes where an unscrupulous Government might...