Word: bells
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Dates: during 2000-2009
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...Russian patriots will not be the only ones upset. The other worried parties are the residents of the southern Pacific, which will be the new home for perhaps as much as 25 tons of Mir debris. The one good thing to come out of their endangerment is that Taco Bell (long known for its interest in space exploration) has created a 40-foot by 40-foot floating target in the Pacific Ocean for Mir to hit -- and has promised a free taco to every man, woman and child in America if the target is struck...
...Crimson applaud Taco Bell's audacity in making this gamble. One estimate of the potential cost to Taco Bell was $10 million--a figure that seems high until one calculates the resulting cost of ingredients for each of 281 million tacos. But Taco Bell has bought insurance anyway, and at relatively low cost, since the target is 10 miles off the coast of Australia, and Mir is expected to crash more than 1,000 miles off the coast of New Zealand...
...outdone, The Crimson would like to meet Taco Bell's offer. We are prepared to offer a free copy of The Crimson to every man, woman and child in the United States in the event that Mir, by some unfortunate and deplorable accident, should happen to smash to ruins the building of the Harvard Lampoon...
...Joaquim Phoenix (To Die For); Jack Black's band striking up "Let's Get It On" in High Fidelity; Wayne and Garth headbanging to "Bohemian Rhapsody;" Timothy Hutton et al singing "Sweet Caroline" in the bar (Beautiful Girls); the tearful recollection of "Rolling With the Homies" in Clueless; Jamie Bell dancing through the streets of Durham as "A Town Called Malice" plays; Dustin Hoffman whistling "Mrs. Robinson"(!) to himself in The Graduate; Winona Ryder and gang dancing to "My Sharona" in the gas-station convenience store (Reality Bites); John Cusack holding up the boombox (of course); Michelle Pfeiffer singing "Making...
Watch out for Gonzaga, too, baby! And, don't count out Kentucky. Tubby Smith, what a coach. And look out for Troy Bell and the Boston College Eagles. Al Skinner, he may be a Cream Puff Delight, but between Bell and Diaper Dandy Ryan Sidney, these Eagles will soar! And Ohio State and Jim O'Brien? Come on, baby! He'd make the All Frank Lloyd Wright team! He's an architect, baby! Slam...