Word: birding
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...experiment in cross-dressing until his secret is uncovered by a former lover who has a secret of her own. The Gourmet Club, the short story of the book's title, is the hidden haven of a gourmand who concocts exotic dishes out of ingredients such as tree bark, bird droppings and human saliva for a menu that might feature "Phlegm-and-Spittle Liquid Jade" or "Velvet Carpeting Soup." Mr. Bluemound represents the epitome of extreme movie goddess worship: a smitten fan constructs a series of actual physical replicates of the star in various positions for his own erotic purposes...
...Then came Wednesday, or as the D-Backs will remember it, Fright Night. The scintillating Schilling, pitching on only three days? rest, served the Yanks his Phoenix early-bird special: large portions of unhittable pitches. But with the D-Backs up 3-1 in the middle of the 8th, manager Bob Brenly made what soon became a historic decision. He lifted Schilling so he would have something left for a possible Game 7. Maybe Brenly had a premonition. In came Byung-Kyun Kim, a 22-year-old submarine-style reliever with a kimchee-hot fastball. Kim whiffed three straight Yanks...
...Toronto. The Ontario police charged him with animal cruelty, although the charge was later dropped. There’s something wonderful about being able to sit around with a bunch of guys in a Burger King or a barber shop and discuss, in sophisticated terms, the history of unfortunate bird deaths in the majors. It speaks to the incredible scope of baseball history...
Even if you are emotionally older than the age of nine and can’t see the humor of the moment, its sheer implausibility has to blow you away. What are the odds of a bird swooping in at that exact moment that close to the ground—in the strike zone, no less? That’s like dropping a coin from the top of the Prudential Center and having it land on its end, or watching a playoff game without seeing one of those commercials for “24?...
...World Series represents everything wrong with baseball, the bird episode shows us so much that’s right—except, I guess, for the violent death part. It’s history. It’s inane chatter that makes bleacher and upper deck tickets the best seats in the house—always. It’s spinning yarns about the weird and the wacky, about the crazy thing that happened “that one time” when the secure boundaries set up by the rules of sport were bent and twisted by the unexpected...