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...sophisticated tycoons—or at least high school randos. Yet we only found old-fashioned randos, belting out “Goodbye, Yellow Brick Road” to seduce desperate chicks.Unperturbed, Chiappini sought to dazzle Bilotti with other charms of southeastern Massachusetts. Stop 1: PLYMOUTH ROCK, the birth canal of America. The rock was identified as the pilgrim’s first landing site—121 years after they landed and 24 miles away from the actual site. As an American, Bilotti of course felt a mystical pull to the rock, like a piece of tape stuck...

Author: By Daniel K Bilotti and Vincent M Chiappini, CONTRIBUTING WRITERS | Title: Turkeys & Trifectas | 12/3/2008 | See Source »

...allow people of the same sex to wed. Archbishop Migliore confirmed on Tuesday that the Vatican had also refused to sign a U.N. document last May in support of the rights of the disabled because it did not include condemnation of abortion, and the rights the fetus with birth defects. Vatican officials nevertheless voiced support for the central principles of the disabled rights document, which Migliore helped craft before the final decision to withhold the Holy See?s signature...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: The Pope's Christmas Gift: A Tough Line on Church Doctrine | 12/3/2008 | See Source »

...principles, even though it is partially government-funded, has been affirmed in the courts. The legal victory was a boon for President Bush's "faith-based" programs, which President-Elect Obama has said he will continue.) The charity espouses most evangelical Christian beliefs, with some exceptions; it is pro-birth control, but anti-surrogate motherhood; it accepts homosexuality, but says gay people must remain celibate; it is pro-life, but takes no official position on the death penalty...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: The Salvation Army | 12/2/2008 | See Source »

...sense the birth of a whole new conspiracy theory...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: Baghdad Scuttlebutt: Pssst! Obama's a Shi'ite | 12/2/2008 | See Source »

...birth of the "Urban Hermit Financial Emergency Rotgut Poverty Plan": While the rest of his fellow Yale alums enjoyed high-profile jobs and piles of cash ("It was the nineties, dammit, and they were getting rich. Just like everybody else"), MacDonald did his best to shirk responsibility - including his tax-paying duties. After several IRS agents came calling to collect nearly $2,000 in back taxes, MacDonald began to ponder questions like, "In basic animal terms, what does it take for a human being to survive? Maybe I didn't need to swallow up half of the Rolling Rock...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: A Story of Self-Induced Starvation | 11/28/2008 | See Source »

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