Word: births
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Dates: during 1980-1989
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Some adoption professionals are troubled by the aggressive pursuit of birth mothers that open adoption has spawned. Without proper counseling, such arrangements can end grievously. As soon as the transaction is legally binding, charges Los Angeles author and adoption consultant Reuben Pannor, too many adoptive couples leave the birth mother high and dry. They change phone numbers, move away or otherwise discourage further contact. "Until an adoption is finalized, the birth mother is treated royally and seductively," he says. "Then the contact is abruptly broken...
...contend with two sets of parents. Still, what does the child call this woman who comes to visit and sends the birthday cards? What is he or she to think when that person later has children she decides to keep? Worst of all, what happens if the birth mother, having endeared herself to her child, suddenly stops coming to visit...
...More than once Nicole has had to battle the urge to pick up Rebecca and run, particularly when Jan went out shopping and left them alone together one day. "I could have just walked out with that baby," recalls Nicole. "My car was right outside." She has joined a birth mothers' support group, and talks about going back to school to become a nurse. The Evanses have invited her family to join them at Thanksgiving and Christmas. Says Jan: "I suspect it will become a yearly ritual...
Mickey is 19 months old but weighs less than 14 lbs. Born infected with the AIDS virus, he was abandoned by his addict mother at birth. His huge, watchful eyes seem to fill half his face; his legs dangle like matchsticks. For ten months after he was born, Mickey languished at a New York City hospital. He never had a visitor...
...while there may be dozens of couples bidding for every healthy white infant, only about one-third of the approximately 36,000 available special-needs kids will be taken in any given year. Some of the rest can be found in hospitals as "boarder babies" -- left behind at birth by addicted or otherwise incapable mothers. Others are crammed into group facilities...