Word: bowen
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...neurotic that we find a group as positive as the Promise Keepers a threat, perhaps we should keep an eye on the Boy Scouts!" CHUCK BOWEN Pelham...
Weaken family ties? But aren't they the glory of our daily existence, one of life's great spiritual rewards? Guess again. In Bowen's view, the emotions that govern family life are often tools of self-interest. Sometimes this is obvious--for example, in an outburst of anger or a fit of jealousy. But even such "good" emotions as affection can be instruments of control wielded out of insecurity. (Ever notice how your social failures outside the home can make your mate suddenly more endearing?) And the moral indignation hurled at a spouse--over his or her coldness, rudeness...
...live with your choice? Kramer's approach draws heavily on the notion of "differentiation of self," developed by the late family therapist Murray Bowen. A person with high differentiation of self is secure--not desperate for signals of approval and affection from others, and thus not easily swayed by social pressure. Bowen considered such autonomy healthy and encouraged people to carry it into their family lives. He wanted them to weaken their emotional ties to kin, including spouses and children...
...Hence Bowen's prescription of cerebral detachment. Far from trying to restore "passion" to a faltering marriage, he would urge you to be dispassionate--not dogmatically judgmental, not desperate for love, not obsessed with your place in the family hierarchy. In theory, such detachment, if achieved by one spouse, can prove contagious, leading to a family full of happily autonomous people...
...when Brooks' record label, EMI, announced in May that it was closing its New York office, and, in the process, getting rid of some of the people he had depended on over the years to market his albums, Brooks decided to withhold his new record indefinitely. Jimmy Bowen, a former head of EMI-Capitol Nashville who worked with Brooks before leaving his post in 1995, predicts the singer will iron out his differences with the label in time to get the CD out by late fall. Says Bowen: "Nobody wins if [Brooks] keeps it in house, including...