Word: boyds
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...Malcolm Boyd used to be an adman and TV producer; now he is a San Francisco nightclub entertainer...
...between times he is also an Episcopal priest who has some highly unorthodox notions about how religion ought to be presented to the modern world. Last week Father Boyd was making like a Mort Sahl or a Lenny Bruce and pulling down $1,000 a week in San Francisco's dark and smoky hungry i. Sitting on a bar stool, his clerical collar shining in the spotlight, he is putting on a four-week act that includes readings from his book of unusual prayers, Are You Running with Me, Jesus? (TIME, Nov. 26), and anecdotal ad libs on such...
...wonder why sex is the big hangup. I was on a television show recently. It was double-A time, you know, people eating TV dinners on trays and ali. And the announcer said, 'Father Boyd, are you in favor of premarital sex?' And I replied in the only honest way I could: 'Do you mean masturbation, petting to orgasm, or coitus?' And he said, 'We must pause now for a commercial...
...before he can explain the discovery, he is attacked by enemy operatives and left in a coma caused by a blood clot in midbrain. Since no conventional operation is possible, the high command approves a daring plan: a miniaturized submarine with a crew of shrunken specialists (led by Stephen Boyd and Raquel Welch) is injected into the carotid artery by hypodermic needle, with orders to navigate the bloodstream to the stricken area, where a surgeon (Arthur Kennedy) will excise the clot with an itsy-bitsy laser...
...climax comes at the site of the clot, where the navigator (Donald Pleasence) turns out to be an enemy agent, hijacks the sub, and tries to kill the patient by ramming a neural ganglion. Not a second too soon, Hemonaut Boyd sinks the sub with the laser gun. The villain is then devoured, head first, by a white cell that resembles a large, aggressive hominy grit. Whereupon the survivors follow the optic nerve until they squirt out of the tear duct and are rescued from a teardrop that looks like Lake Michigan. And then back, BACK, BACK to normal size...