Word: calley
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...officer trainee, Calley insists, he was never taught that he might encounter friendly Vietnamese. Instead, "it was drummed into us, 'Be sharp! Be on your guard! As soon as you think these people won't kill you-zap!' " When he first arrived in Viet Nam on Dec. 1, 1967, Calley felt "like the meanest, the most tremendous weapon there is. My rifle swung low. My helmet pulled down. I was scowling even. I felt this is my big day. And these are my men. And we're going to end this whole damned war tomorrow...
Kill Count. Calley was still eager when he took his platoon into the countryside south of Danang and set up an ambush for Viet Cong troops. "I knew the V.C. were somewhere nearby because-well, I was in South Viet Nam. Our captain, Captain Medina, wouldn't send me somewhere if I couldn't get a big kill count, right?" For hours nothing happened. Calley's bravado turned to fear when he realized that his inexperienced soldiers had made too much noise to surprise any approaching enemy. "The V.C. must know I'm here. They must...
...more nights of ambush without combat followed, Calley became depressed. "What am I pulling ambushes for? What am I running patrols for? Or searching for? We want to fight." Instead of seeing Viet Cong, his men had to deal mainly with prostitutes seeking business, and swarms of kids selling Cokes and offering to do the G.I.s' laundry. Calley tells of making shy love to a young madam and then trying to dis cuss political philosophy with her: "Susie had never heard of Communism or democracy." If he explained the difference, Calley thought, and she said that she preferred Communism...
...first Esquire article does not carry Calley through the My Lai attack, but after he was charged with the multiple murders, he clung to that same sense of duty: "Well, the war's wrong. Killing's wrong. But that's what my country asked...
Back in the U.S., Calley began to be bothered by doubts. People would come up to him and say that they were on his side. "What can I say if a gentleman tells me, 'I know you're right,' if I have an inner conflict and I myself don't know it? Maybe the mission in My Lai was wrong. What is a V.C.? Is a man with a hand grenade a V.C.? Someone who houses him, is that a V.C.? I'm home now and I hear people saying, 'Everyone there...