Word: carterisms
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...marriage," says Hartman, who is sensitive enough about the issue that she asked that we not use her real name. Indeed, losing friends often intensifies the alienation and unlovability divorces feel. "One thing that cushions the effect of divorce is social interconnectedness," says Linda Carter, director of the Family Studies Center at New York University's Child Study Center and a couples therapist. In other words, friends don't let friends divorce alone...
...when the divorces are acrimonious, therapists and marital lawyers say, people almost always have to choose sides, at least for a while. This usually means that the women have an easier time. "Women are trained from an early age to be relationship oriented," says Carter. "And they're very often the ones who have been the keepers of the social flame." Men, often unfamiliar with the mechanics of socializing, are doubly at a loss when they have to deal with feeling worthless as well. "Very often the closest friend of a man is his wife," Carter says. "When he loses...
...lots of support, choose the other. Eventually, both exes may build new lives with new partners, and it's possible the friendship will not last or will change. But therapists emphasize how important it is not to desert the former couple. This is especially true, says nyu's Carter, if there are children. "As far as kids are concerned, the fewer broken connections, the better," she says. "Having the sense that Mom has friends who are also friends with Dad tells them that not everything in the world has changed." --With reporting by Lisa McLaughlin/New York
Carter’s heavy-handed tactics also could have come from an autocrat’s handbook. She called the printer and told him to stop the presses. The printer objected citing the First Amendment, but Carter reminded him that the University was paying, not the students. The paper has not been published since...
...Carter should know that a school paper is not merely a platform for University propaganda. The student press should connect the administration to the student body, investigating and exposing problems like grade inflation. Its editorial page should scrutinize school policy, offer solutions and keep University officials accountable and honest. Otherwise there are few checks on the administration, which is there, ostensibly, to serve the students...