Word: chickwichs
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...irrelevant when we consider all the other things we could be spending our time on. But even for the most relaxed amongst us, there are certain rules so inviolable that to break them is to be cast out from the dining hall community faster (alright, much faster) than a chickwich comes off the grill. Thus, in order to promote harmony and a better relationship between all eaters, I present to you the cardinal sins of the dining hall...
...chicken’ is very generous. It’s not chicken. It’s bits of white fat cooked in more fat and covered in bread crumbs to hide the lack of meat. That’s why you will not see me eat a Chickwich...
Though it’s hard to imagine a chickwich originating from anything organic—let alone a chicken—it did. But before the chicken reached your plate in its rubbery form, it was most likely confined to a small cage with seven other chickens. Inside this cell, the chicken was either “shocked” through starvation or disoriented by artificial lighting to overeat and, as a result, suffer obesity conditions like heart attacks. Ultimately, when the hen became huge, it was hung upside-down, had its legs snapped into metal shackles, its throat...
...messing around with all the spices at the salad bar the other day and my chickwich has never tasted better! How about “Things You Can Make at Annenberg...
Pete writes the sections of the magazine people actually read. The brains behind the brawn-fest that was the famed Chickwich Challenge, and the tortured protagonist of Say Hi To Pete, someday his Gossip Guy will contain juicy rumors that do not actually relate to his roommates or Crimson President Amit R. Paley...