Word: clauses
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Long ago and far away there was a land where it was always Christmas. It had not always been that way. Once there was only one day a year when people exchanged presents as we do. There was only one Santa Claus then, and it was all he could do to prepare presents for everyone and then distribute them all in one frantic night of frenzied, orgiastic gift-giving. It inevitably took a team of psychiatrists several months to rebuild the monomaniacal old man's psyche, and Santa inevitably spent the rest of the year following his recovery doing...
...then Santa sold out. More specifically, he sold the rights to his name and his holiday to a multinational business seeking to diversify. Amalgamated Widget Corporation got Santa's franchise for a song, because old Claus had no idea that his hobby was of any value, and besides, his doctors had been urging him for years to retire for his health. His job gave him ulcers. So Santa left Christmas behind to spend his last years breeding mutant strains of reindeer for high-speed sleigh competition, and Amalgamated Widget became The Santa Corporation...
...Santa Claus and many religious leaders objected at first when Christmas Day became Christmas Long Weekend, but The Santa Corporation created Claus Reindeer Raceway to mollify the jolly golden-age elf, and the company paid spiritual operatives to develop splinter sects for Christmas Reformists...
...patent rights to aerial reindeer sleighs. But The Santa Corporation retained elves who specialized in festive law, and anyway, elf-scientists working at the corporation's North Pole South Building in one of the land's commercial centers had already advanced mystical sleigh technology beyond the rudimentary level old Claus had once achieved. In a last-ditch effort, wealthy holiday preservationists organized a Jolly Old Elf Legal Fund, but their $100-a-plate dinners helped only their consciences...
...those days a cult arose among the most disaffected Santalanders--a cult centered around the now-mythic figure of the original Santa Claus. And as The Santa Corporation's plants continued to churn out gifts that would probably never be unwrapped, the Clausists' following grew...