Word: columnized
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...Lumumba Seegars ’09 is a Social Studies concentrator in Dunster House. His column appears regularly...
...worst part is that this column has been a total failure. We put our hearts, souls, and every joke that we had made in the preceding week into every column, but it netted us nothing except tens of links to tasteless humor when you google our names. Even when we bared our disgusting, slutty, and totally irresponsible sex lives to the world, we didn’t get so much as a mention on IvyGate.com or a column in the Boston Globe. But the column helped us pick up girls, right? Not exactly, the one girl DA got through...
...what leaves us even more distraught is the lack of effect we’ve had on the student body. Nine months of peddling genuine Wisconsin-made wisdom butter in Harvard Yard may have been one human gestation cycle wasted. Had we had access to amniocentesis for our column, we would have had aborted it faster than DA’s parents chose him over the less developed fetus he shared a liver, kidneys, and large intestine with. Our sales pitch, “Let us butter your domes,” drew in more perverts from the square than...
...Jessica C. Coggins ’08 is a women, gender, and sexuality studies concentrator in Cabot House. Her column appears regularly...
Adam Goldenberg ’08 is a social studies concentrator in Winthrop House. He is chair of the College Events Board. His column appears regularly...