Word: comfortes
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...what about that comfort zone of Social Security, Medicare, Medicaid and food stamps, plus the infrastructure currently funded by the federal government, including bridges, roads and particularly the interstate highways? One analysis by a researcher at the University of Vermont found that the state only gets 75 cents back for every dollar it hands over to the federal center. The secessionists say they'd prefer to save their money and keep it at home. "Not only would an independent Vermont survive," says Naylor, "It would thrive, because it would free up entrepreneurial forces heretofore held in abeyance...
...abusive relationship we have with the central government," says Peter Garritano, a square-jawed 54-year-old Subaru sales manager who is running for lieutenant governor. "We know it's scary to leave the abusive nest. It's a comfort zone in its own way. But we think we'll do better leaving...
...toilet paper at Harvard does not offer the gentle and comforting caress that is to be expected at a university of international renown. Indeed, the toilet paper provided is inexcusably average, and of no comfort to the pale and pampered tush of the average Harvard student. Many minutes of study time have been wasted by this glorified tissue paper and its frustrating inability to properly attend to even the lightest of Au Bon Pain and frappacino-infused pâtés, let alone a heavy-duty Rubinoff and Noch’s combo...
According to my conservative estimates toilet paper-less defecation occurs at a rate of at least 40.5 freshman tushies and 23 upperclassmen tushies a day. Comfort and peace of mind demand that we take action. The first step that must be taken is to provide a brand of toilet paper that is both comfortable enough to accommodate the discerning buttocks and durable enough to prevent messy private failure. Quality toilet paper can be consumed like caviar—in smaller amounts than fast food but with greater amounts of utility...
...Preference”, is available at 76¢ per roll and Charmin’s “Ultra Soft”, a bathroom tissue befitting a patrician, is a reasonable 83¢ per roll. That extra seven cents is an investment in the comfort of the next Emerson, and will allow us to once again raise aloft a standard of obscene luxury that Yale and peer institutions will again struggle to match...