Word: conan
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Dates: during 2000-2009
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...Schwarzenegger's approval rating is down to 30%. After he heard this, he said, 'I'm not going to act all upset and hurt because I don't have that kind of range.'" --CONAN O'BRIEN...
...Alito is confirmed, there will be two Supreme Court Justices from New Jersey. Experts say this could cause a reversal in the famous case Mullet v. Back Hair." --CONAN O'BRIEN...
Cloning David Letterman White guys sitting around talking, wisecracking, introducing nutty comedy bits: Doesn't anybody have any new ideas for a late-night show? Chevy, Conan, Jay and soon Greg Kinnear (from E!'s Talk Soup) are all trying vainly to duplicate Dave. Come back, Joan Rivers, all is forgiven...
...This prompted Nancy J.D. Harding of McLean, Virginia, to write us about a truly malicious presidential feline: ''One cat before Socks has already distinguished himself in the wreckage department -- Calvin Coolidge's.'' The pet, appropriately named Tiger, wore out his welcome very quickly. ''Evidently Tiger was a real 'Conan the Destroyer' beastie,'' reports Harding. ''His destructive ways cost the Coolidges a valuable antique bedspread and Tiger his stately home. My grandmother took him in -- briefly.'' Although the White House has always been home to presidential pets -- mostly dogs, birds, an alligator and more than a dozen cats -- no damaging tales...
...government announced it would not accept more than 300,000 meals donated to Hurricane Katrina victims by the British. A U.S. government spokesperson explained that the Katrina victims have suffered enough." --CONAN O'BRIEN...