Word: crotched
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Matthew Schmidt bought his first mountain bike 10 years ago, and from the onset his recreational rides in the idyllic Mount Tamalpais area of California's Marin County left him numb in his personal undercarriage, where the crotch meets the bicycle saddle. Schmidt, 42, of San Rafael, Calif., dismissed the discomfort as the price to pay for vigorous riding on rough terrain. But by the end of 2002, the perineal pain and sexual problems he had experienced for years became intense. He stopped riding and, desperate for answers, saw several urologists before the last finally diagnosed pudendal-nerve damage, caused...
Genitalia-friendly seats have been commercially available for years. Since 1983, Hobson Associates, based in the Los Angeles suburb of Reseda, has sold more than half a million of its noseless Easyseats, which feature a split seat that reduces pressure on the crotch and retail for about $30. The company has two new models set to debut this summer. Terry Precision Cycling in Macedon, N.Y., has more than a dozen styles for women and 10 for men, each with a traditional nose but a cutaway seat wider than most performance saddles. They range in price from...
...looked a lot like Norah but with accessories: a sports bra to keep her breasts under wraps, a manly new flat-top haircut, a weight-lifting routine to bulk out Norah's girly shoulders, and a prosthetic penis to fill out his/her crotch. And Vincent hired a voice coach to teach her to talk like a guy--slowly, with as little expression as humanly possible, keeping those emotions under wraps and the hand gestures to a minimum...
...emotional endurance. Lester, a young bartender, experiences "wrecks both literal and figurative, replete with flames, blood, crushed metal and broken hearts." He isn't alone. In other stories, a radio DJ must survive 12 days without sleep for a p.r. promotion and a couple is trapped in a crotch-high snowdrift on a back mountain road. The gratification comes as each, captured in Boyle's calculating and caustic prose, fights his or her way out of the wreckage. --By Rebecca Myers...
They got the hots and the hates for each other, do Eddie and May. Have ever since they were kids; will till the day they die. They fight, they sulk. They fall into a passion out by the horse truck, and she knees his crotch. He is a cowboy, better known as the Death of the Western Hero: to strut his forlorn machismo he arrogantly lassoes garbage cans and jukeboxes. She hangs around the tatty trailer camp, sponging the Mojave Desert dust off her body, waiting for night and their star-crossed adagio to start all over again...