Word: cryobank
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Still, I'm having trouble swallowing the idea that the California Cryobank opened up shop on Mass Ave.--minutes away from both Harvard and MIT--on a mere fluke. And, in fact, it isn't long before my sophomore informant remembers that he did have to list his SAT scores on one of the early questionnaires...
...Harvard lines up with the legend, I do some snooping around. Surprisingly, it isn't long before I find a sperm bank regular. A sophomore and an athlete, he's willing to talk on the condition of anonymity. He tells me that he first heard about the California Cryobank in The Crimson of all places, in the small advertisement the company places in the paper about once a week...
...discuss everything from the Mass. Ave. cryobank's handprint-scanning identification system to its small green cups to its closed-circuit TV system. Still, it isn't long before he starts to deconstruct the myth. It comes out that an extensive medical profile and a battery of tests are required to become a California Cryobank employee, as well as a sperm-count that doubles the average. This screening process leaves less than 10 percent of the males eligible...
Wondering how far the local lab goes in taking advantage of the Harvard name (Does it charge different rates for Ivy League and non-Ivy-League sperm?) I dial up the cryobank's Web page. Sure enough, it contains a small but noticeable boast: "The majority of our donors come from UCLA, USC, UC Berkeley, Stanford University, Harvard University and MIT." As of March 1, 1996, the Web site reads, the cost of a sample for fertilization starts at $142, for something called an intracervical insemination...
...charts which list categories ranging from donor height to "occupation or major" there is no column reserved for college affiliation. Still, I've got a lingering feeling that if the California Cryobank is going to go through the trouble of attracting students at elite coastal colleges as its donors, it's got to give clients some means to insure that the sample they buy has US News & World Report Top 25 genes...