Word: custered
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...lovers. Old Ralph Waldo Emerson is having a chat with the dead Henry David Thoreau: "Sex can be messy; art can't. That's why I've always preferred it." Then just about everyone shows up in Montana, where Louisa falls for General George Armstrong Custer, and Charlotte dallies with a Dietrichesque saloon singer who is really a man. They all die at Little Big Horn and go to heaven. And in the wink of a REM, the dream is over...
Richard Mulligan is the only glimmer of brightness in the mawkishness. He plays a harmless loony accidentally recruited as an emergency substitute teacher. Mulligan is the only person ever shown as teaching, albeit in the unusual format of dressing up as Lincoln, Washington, and Custer. He is the only actor who invests his part with the gentleness that great teachers possess. But Mulligan's work is wasted. No actor can really shine in a role that is essentially a bad joke. Yes, you guessed it: "You have to be crazy to teach...
Investigators plan next to focus on the fate of the 37 men of E Company who died in battle. Many experts believe Custer sent them to protect his left flank. Others claim they were rushing from the slaughter through a gulch called Deep Ravine. Mounds exposed by the fire will be excavated. Any skeletons found will be examined for powder burns, which might indicate suicide...
Montanans are used to Custer controversy. The Crow Indians, who hold most of the 9,000 privately owned acres slicing through the battlefield, leased land for the 1969 filming of Little Big Man, which portrayed Custer as a grandiose madman. Monument boosters who prefer a more sober-eyed version of the hero are trying to raise $8 million to buy the land...
...results of the current cataloguing, scheduled to continue into next month, will eventually be published. Will they offer definitive answers? Unlikely. "We will create some new questions," thinks Montana Archaeologist Richard Fox. "We'll be putting more fuel on the fire." Custer, who could handle newsmen as well as horses, might have enjoyed the smoke signals...