Word: cw
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...CW: Don't get all misty-eyed on me, darling. Another great thing that Harvard has to offer is the E. You see, this maligned letter is excluded from the grading system at most schools. But Harvard, in her infinite sensitivity, has brought back the E. She's also exiled F, E's evil sister, from the report card. So when people say that you can't flunk at Harvard, that's what they mean. If you're a conscientious comper, not only will you get comped by your editor, but your report card will also be sprinkled with magnanimous...
...CW: Stay and you will be rewarded. Besides Belgian waffles on Sundays, Harvard has plenty to offer. You know, people say that they stay here to get a degree that reads "Harvard" in big letters. What students don't realize is that employers couldn't care less about the word Harvard. All they really want to see are the letters...
...CW: A.B. means "Arts Bachelor." Had you gone anywhere else, including somewhere warm and sunny and Spanish-speaking, you would have graduated with a B.A. It's only Harvard that can give you an A.B. That's what people mean when they say that Harvard is special...
...CW: I already told you, blockhead, people outside of Harvard don't comp. But I'm glad you're staying and graduating. And not only will you get a crimson A.B., but you'll pick it up dressed in a regal crimson robe. Others wear boring black robes, but Harvard is not only wise but also fashion savvy. Crimson your robe shall...
...CW: No, dearie. I have plenty to do just with getting you properly nourished. Now go get some food, and don't forget to read the Nutrition Bites. You know, I came up with that clever name myself...