Word: damon
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Every good Bible story needs a heavenly visitation. Bethany (Fiorentino) gets hers from the angel Metatron (Alan Rickman), who tells her she is Jesus' distant descendant and it is her destiny to save the world. Two fallen angels, Loki (Matt Damon) and Bartleby (Affleck), have found a doctrinal loophole that will allow them to return to Heaven by walking through a parish door in New Jersey. "It will undo the world," Bethany is told--unless she can stop the renegades from defying...
...brink of a crisis of faith, who is unknowingly the great, great, great, etc. grand-niece of Jesus Christ. She is enlisted by a seraph named Metatron (a whiny Alan Rickman) to thwart two banished angels from getting to a church in New Jersey. These winged renegades, Loki (Matt Damon) and Bartelby (Ben Affleck), have found a loophole in Catholic doctrine which could cleanse them of their sins and allow them to re-enter heaven, negating the truth that God is infallible and consequently unmaking existence. These two Jersey-bound travelers don't understand the consequences of their scheme...
...begins once three worthy Best Picture nominees have opened (that's totally an arbitrary definition, but who cares!). So you have The Insider, American Beauty and Three Kings starting all the buzz, and you can look forward to a boatload in upcoming weeks. The Talented Mr. Ripley (starring Matt Damon as the "talented" asexual murderer), The Green Mile (from the director of The Shawshank Redemption starring Tom Hanks), The Hurricane (with Denzel Washington in the controversial lead role), Snow Falling on Cedars and Magnolia (flying frogs!) all open in the next two months. So start getting to that movie theater...
...sweetly agreeable bit of fluff if its story wasn't so darn predictable. The film offers up a fairly tired plot, but then so did Deep Blue Sea, and I enjoyed every moment of that because it did such a good job of subverting its own genre. Director Damon Santostefano shows little creative flair, however, and spends most of his time desperately trying to find a comic tone, shifting between broad slapstick and homosexual farce...
...Sean: Aramark doesn't let us ask the players for autographs. I met Cal Ripken briefly. He was sitting with his family and he bought Italian ice for all of them. And I also met Matt Damon when he was in the celebrity hitting challenge. He was horrible. I said, "Better luck next round...