Word: dartboard
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...Wednesday, Dartboard nestled in next to her closest friends to watch the highly anticipated—and highly unusual—primetime press conference held by our fair George W. Only the third one of its kind since the onset of his seemingly endless tenure, Dartboard had begun to think she’d only conjured the image of this ill-fated president. She quickly realized she had no such luck. So, as the night approached, Dartboard prepared to jeer and mock the out-of-good-graces leader, as is customary. But as she braced herself to wince at mispronunciations...
...most reverent of quick-witted Clinton must admit that hardly anyone could hold a candle to his charisma—least of all Mr. Bush. So, it’s not fair to judge poor George against such insuperable talent. Where Bush does excel, however—and where Dartboard was supremely impressed—is in his ability to shamelessly avoid questions, of any significance, and turn a random query into a dissertation on how he is (single-handedly) “making the world a better place...
...Laden Determined to Strike in U.S.’” Although it seems that such pointed questions and blatant evidence (to reiterate: “Bin Laden Determined to Strike in U.S.”) would make anyone buckle and admit some fault, Dartboard realized that Bush’s unparalleled talents rendered him completely immune to this bullying...
...haven’t—you just put me under the spot here and maybe I’m not quick—as quick on my feet as I should be in coming up with one.” And though it’s difficult for Dartboard to decipher Bush’s peculiar vernacular, she thinks she gets the gist...
...Dartboard sighs, a love like this, and this, and this deserves to be broadcasted to the greater Harvard community in its entirety. Dartboard begs you, thefacebook.com, don’t leave me hanging...