Word: dildo
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There was more, including a page of thoughtful dildo reviews. The “Venus Wrap” is a “bright pink wishbone with not one but two pleasing prongs.” The “Deluxe Crystal Wand” is great for “probing the spot I love the most—the G-spot. It allows you to reach your happy place with finesse and pressure, just as hard as you like.” The “Twist” is a leather arm binder...
...composure among scattered boos to deliver six minutes of profanity-scattered rhymes too quick for the fingers on CBS's seven-second delay. In the end, the controversial rapper did not win Album of the Year. Instead the academy honored two aging hipsters who named their band after a dildo in William Burroughs' Naked Lunch and sang a jazzy tune about a pedophile who organizes a three-way. Amazingly, there were no formal Steely Dan protests, unless you consider a nation of people asking "Are they still alive?" a form of protest...
...Clinton enjoys his cigars. She unabashedly lusts for one-night stands, and, in recent memory, has slept with a munchkin, a guy who pops Viagra for the extra thrust, and a man so large even Samantha feared she would get lockjaw. She cut off her romance with L.A.'s Dildo King--despite his phenomenal size and stamina--because he wanted more than just the sex. It would be safe to call Samantha a slut. On the other hand, she never hesitates to indulge herself--something we could use a little more of on campus...
...There are also a few good sex shops around town, if your God-given digits simply don't cut it. Tucked away in Central Square is Hubba Hubba--a decent little sex shop where the leather is abundant and the dildos come with a lifetime warranty. "Yeah, I masturbate," says one sophomore in Quincy House, "though I never thought about using a dildo--not that I opposed to it or anything." For those who might want to give it a try, a standard issue silicon dildo will run you about $35, the larger sizes or uniquely decorative pieces...
...main thing, obviously, is to do whatever works--whether it be a 10-pound glass dildo (no judgement calls here) or the tip of your pinkie finger applied ever so lightly to your sweet pearl...