Word: disemboweling
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Dates: during 1990-1999
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Rumor: Giuliani has secreted himself and a few trusted aides in a $15 billion fortified bunker deep beneath Central Park, defended by a corps of specially trained killer moles, which can spot and, with their frighteningly large incisors, quickly disembowel any enemies of the city attempting to infiltrate the deliberately darkened access tunnel. Fact: The mayor has sensibly proposed building an emergency control center for merely $15 million in the World Trade Center. Should any danger--be it a raid by crazed fundamentalist bioterrorists, a stock-market crash or a strike of rollerblading dog walkers--threaten New York, the mayor...
Just ask Jimmy Johnson, who coached the Dallas Cowboys to overwhelming victories in the past two Super Bowls, then suddenly found himself out of a job last week. Cowboys owner Jerry Jones insisted that the decision to have Johnson disembowel himself was agreed upon "mutually." Johnson, for his part, embraced his old Arkansas college roommate and insisted to the press, "I can sincerely tell you that I feel better today about Jerry Jones as a friend than I have in our entire relationship...