Word: disneyized
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...folks behind the reception desk at the Hotel Santa Fe speak an aggregate of 13 languages. Perhaps not all perfectly. Prince Charles has said that the universal language is bad English, and much of that can be heard at Euro Disney. "I gezz zare was a mizunderstood," apologizes a French staff member who boasts, "I speak British." Fractured franglais is also spoken here. At Buffalo Bill's Wild West Show -- a dinner theater where you eat chili and spareribs while watching Annie Oakley fire at cowbells that play La Marseillaise -- the host tells his auditors, "If yer hungry...
...Euro Disney is not a French adaptation of the company's parks in California and Florida. The Gallic accent is muted. There is no Moliere's Magic Theater, no Mad Marcel Proust's teacup ride. Euro Disney is the familiar all-American park somehow landed on 5,000 acres of wheat fields and beet fields in Marne- la-Vallee, 20 miles east of Paris. The attractions do not presume to explain Europe to Europe; instead they celebrate America the bland and beautiful, and reinvent it, Disney-style. Hence the transcontinental, cross- cultural ruckus...
...sights are as droll as that of the European intelligentsia trying to have a rotten time. Five years ago, when Disney executives announced plans for the park at a ceremony in front of the Paris Bourse, they were pelted with eggs and tomatoes. Where their children (who buy 10 million copies of Le Journal de Mickey) see a mouse, French intellectuals smell a rat. They called the project "Euro Disgrace," "Euro Dismal," "a cultural Chernobyl...
...fair, there is no consensus among the French. (How could there be? They're French!) The naysayers -- those who approach someone returning from a visit to the site and ask, with anticipatory glee, "Well, is it grotesque?" -- are simply not Euro Disney's customers. One must remind them that this is an amusement park, a place of diversion for children and their indulgent parents. Attendance is not mandatory. Neither is the wish of the locals that an American entertainment complex take on Impressionist colors (though Euro Disney does, handsomely) and French subtitles...
...Euro Disney offers few sops to European traditions. Wine may be as mother's milk to the French, but they will find only "mocktails" at the restaurants inside the park; they must get their hand stamped at the turnstile, walk a few yards to the nearest hotel bar and drown their rancor there. The Pinocchio and Star Tours rides, among others, provide French dialogue, but visitors who have no English will miss the verbal nuances that lend the park its impish...