Word: doled
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...means, smile. The candidate sporting a silly grin beats the one wearing a scowl. Yes, Richard Nixon glided to a dark victory; but there's an exception to every rule. Consider Jimmy Carter after he discovered malaise. Consider George Bush after the economy slipped. Consider Bob Dole. And, by the way, it is the economy, stupid. People vote their ATM cards and money-market accounts. Other lessons, for good or for bad, peculiar to this campaign...
Primogeniture must go. To paraphrase Bob Dole: Wake up, Republicans, and join the rush to meritocracy. To make room for younger, stronger candidates without dissing your elder statesmen, consider something like the Oscars' Irving Thalberg Lifetime Achievement Award. Snag some headline entertainer like Jay Leno sufficient to attract network coverage, and air the same hagiographic film that would otherwise be shown at the convention. Better that the candidate end his career in prime time, droning on about his second-grade teacher, than at sparsely attended airport rallies, shouting epithets into the wind...
Like desperate passengers abandoning ship, President Clinton's cabinet members and top administration aides are involved in a mass exodus. Clinton did not even have time to savor his crushing (though expected) victory over the hapless Bob Olde--excuse me, that's Bob Dole--before he had to start searching for replacements and explaining to the press why his staff was deserting...
Housing Secretary Henry Cisneros is expected to resign any day now. The White House is also trying to get Attorney General Janet Reno to resign. Administration officials are planting leaks about her battle with Parkinson's disease to try to force her out. Not even Bob Dole was treated so harshly...
...Undergraduate Council's Finance Committee met this Halloween to decide how to dole out part of the $36,000 it gives to student groups each semester...