Word: dudeness
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This is not great Condon, but it is good Condon. The murdered dude was a whiz-bang insurance salesman, the best-dressed knight of the Million Dollar Round Table and a sure bet to pull down $ 150,000 a year. Naturally his wife wants him back. Using a computerized electronic prayer wheel that she whips up with her soldering iron, she petitions all gods ancient and modern, known or rumored, and becomes (to the surprise of the gods themselves) the first soul in recorded eternity to get a message through...
Before long, Marshfield's worst problem seems to be a case of terminal cuteness. Unlike Humbert, he is not facing a murder trial. He is passing through a clerical dude ranch, free to resume his pallid philandering as soon as he leaves...
...dude I've disliked since we were both eight years old, on the other hand, plays the piano. His favorite technical device is putting five beats into four-beat songs so as to syncopiate them. He also likes to try to steal the ball from his teammates, so as to keep them from getting upset. This is not always so good for team morale...
...ball would take this strange trajectory and end up in the basket. If the Institute of Defense Analysis had been around to watch, they'd probably have junked the electronic battlefield. Truck and Meyer and Ed Thompson and Matt Busby just stared and watched, and after awhile even the dude I've disliked since we were both eight years old stopped trying to steal the ball from his teammates because he realized it didn't make any difference. "Where did you learn to shoot that way?" they said. I just smiled...
This will probably not happen this Christmas, I suppose, although in a year when Chairman Mao shakes hands with Mrs. Marcos and the Mets trade Tug McGraw, how can you tell for sure? The dude with the piano is going to be a success, soon. I feel it in my bones. I do not want to talk to him. Also, the one time I tried to play some hoop this fall, some tough-looking twelve-year-olds chased us off their court, and I didn't make a shot all afternoon. When these people call next week, maybe I will...