Word: elis
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...right on time, The Game went on to its inevitable conclusion. And at this point, we can only guess who was responsible for the half-baked scheme, but it has Eli painted all over it. Clearly, the failed display—like a botched college application for admission—sprang from a feeble mind. And though Harvard has its eccentrics, Yale has made being pathologically desperate an art. Indeed, a centuries-old inferiority complex pervades the daily existence of the Yalie, a fascinating iteration of humanity that combines decently high SAT scores with an irrational penchant for mediocrity...
...impeachment trial. In mid-to late 2002, as the Iraq war loomed, the MoveOn e-mail list doubled, to 1 million. Wes and Joan hooked up with Zack Exley, whose parody campaign 2000 website, GWBush.com caused candidate Bush to declare, "There ought to be some limits to freedom"; and Eli Pariser, 22, a New Yorker whose post-9/11 e-mail petition for peace was signed by 500,000 people worldwide. All four still work out of their homes, communicating by e-mail, instant messaging and a regular Tuesday conference call...
...nothing cures a seemingly disappointing season like a 37-19 thrashing of poor Eli in front of 53,136 at the Yale Bowl...
...true devotee of veritas. (We need no artificial lux for intellectual trail-blazing under Cambridge’s bright daytime skies; and unlike Yalies, we actually have lives once the sun goes down, and visits to the local police station don’t count.) But as pathetic as Eli is, he is an insidious pest. The task of eliminating the malformed menace from New Haven is a Herculean one, far beyond the reach of any one class or team. Harvard’s vast physical holdings will no doubt extend one day to the grotto where Yale now lurks...
...Eli. S. Yalie. BOOYAH...