Word: erful
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...over to Jester: The Online Joke Recommender at shadow.ieor.berkeley.edu/humor. The site combines sophisticated statistical analysis with a database of rib ticklers. After homing in on your sense of humor through a series of test jokes - How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? (Answer: er ... better go to the Jester website; this is a family magazine) - it serves up jokes especially tailored to fit your funny bone...
...seems as though an arms race has begun in American high schools: as a tiny number of disaffected kids stockpiles guns and home-made bombs to mimic Columbine's Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold (or at least threaten to), communities are investing millions of dollars to bring armed cops--er, "resource officers"--to campus, along with metal detectors and security cameras...
...some time with his family, reflecting. But Puffy is drawn to cool things - kind the way the rest of us are tempted to touch hot things to see if they're actually hot - and tonight this is the coolest spot in town. I also spot Eriq La Salle of "ER," Michael Beach of "Third Watch" and a few other celebs...
...Monday, the NASDAQ dropped more than 6 percent and found a low - 1923 - not seen since December 1998; the mind-blowing 15-month rally that pushed the tech-heavy index to beyond 5000 on March 10 of last year is now utterly erased. The Dow dropped, er, only 4.1 percent (a measly 436 points) as each and every one of the index's 30 stocks lost ground. And the S&P 500 finally slipped into official "bear market" territory, now 23 percent off its highs and tasting those same December 1998 depths as the NASDAQ...
This week CBS takes the battle to the biggest target of all. ER is America's reigning No. 1 series, but partly by default: it has had little competition for years, except weak newsmagazines. And lately it has become prime-time's biggest, albeit best-loved, piece of deadwood, relying on stunt casting, gunshots in the corridors, tearjerking storylines and ever-more-Job-like afflictions for its long-suffering staff. With Anthony Edwards announcing his departure in 2002, the writers have more than a year to slowly and mawkishly kill his Dr. Mark Greene with that brain tumor. ER...