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...might be accepted. It is rarely “accepted;” we aren’t here to accept or reject—we’re here to be amused. The more dazzling, personal, unorthodox, paradoxic your assumptions (paradoxes are not equivocations), the more interesting an essay is likely to be. (If you have a chance to confer with the assistant in advance, of course—and we all like to be called “assistants,” not “graders”—you may be able to ferret...

Author: By A Grader | Title: A Grader’s Reply | 5/16/2007 | See Source »

...discussion of the various methods whereby the crafty student attempts to show the grader that he knows a lot more than he actually does, the vague generality is the key device. A generality is a vague statement that means nothing by itself, but when placed in an essay on a specific subject very well might mean something to the grader. The true master of a generality is the man who can write a 10-page essay, which means nothing at all to him, and have it mean a great deal to anyone who reads it. The generality writer banks...

Author: By Donald Carswell | Title: Beating the System | 5/16/2007 | See Source »

...take the typical example, “Hume brought empiricism to its logical extreme.” The question is asked, “Did the philosophical beliefs of Hume represent the spirit of the age in which he lived?” Our hero replies by opening his essay with, “David Hume, the great Scottish philosopher, brought empiricism to its logical extreme. If these be the spirit of the age in which he lived, then he was representative of it.” This generality expert has already taken his position for the essay. Actually...

Author: By Donald Carswell | Title: Beating the System | 5/16/2007 | See Source »

...obsessed with food—I even wrote my college essay on food—so I often eat in nice restaurants, yet I also understand that about three billion people in this world survive on less than...

Author: By Jarret A. Zafran | Title: That Constant Gnawing Guilt | 5/11/2007 | See Source »

...guerilla publicity campaign. "This government, and especially the Prime Minister, doesn't seem to have an awareness of the importance of art and culture," Martel charges. His campaign, intended to encourage Harper's Conservative government to make the arts and arts funding a higher priority, was launched with an essay in the national newspaper The Globe and Mail, has its own website, and has succeeded in attracting considerable media attention. Many Canadians regard government grants to arts institutions and artists as essential for protecting and nurturing Canadian culture in the midst of a constant flood of American influence. "I hope...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: A Canadian Literacy Campaign for One | 5/11/2007 | See Source »

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