Word: feedback
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...Feedback, from Harvard University Food Services, Sept. 1977. Vol. II, No. 1, p. 1, quoting prestigious New England Journal of Medicine...
SWELL JUST SWELL. Seven thousand dollars a year, and what do you get? Cold cereal in the morning (and don't forget the additives) served in plastic bowls, three bean salad, and, beginning last year, Feedback. And what, you rightfully ask, is Feedback? It would. I suppose, be too facile to simply answer, "Just what the name implies." It seems that the Food Services were recently bequeathed several million reams of top-quality 100 per cent rag content paper and have hired both a dead codfish and retired songstress Hildegard Knish (pronounced K'nish) to write their publicity releases. (Just...
...lapse. (Must have been something I ate.) Anyhow, last week witnessed the proverbial last straw. That friendly little Feedback had suddenly turned into a value-judgment spouting, semi-literate mouthpiece of the additive lobby. You've got to read it to believe it. It does everything from quoting the "prestigious New England Journal of Medicine" paraphrasing Justice Oliver Wendell Holmes entirely out of context to in-pugning that "health faddist, Gloria Swanson, somewhat better known at that time (and before) for her dramatic abilities." It was people of Swanson's ilk, we are told, who had to spoil...
...with the notion that cancer was killing us, when it was cancerphobia instead!! Anyhow, when the Food Services were contacted last week and pressed to identify the author of this gratuitous swill, a spokesperson said, "No one wrote it." It seems that it was a slow summer in the Feedback mailroom, and so the Big Codfish and Ms. Knish were instructed to come up with a page of meaningful filler for the upcoming Registration Issue...
...well, Mr. and Ms. Codfish, you can cat my additives for me. But, alas, upon sober reflection, I guess that in the balance, and for the moment, at least, I'm sold on Feedback in its present format. After all--it is good for something: as in their infinite wisdom the Cods have chosen to leave the backside blank, I was able to type this article on it. Also makes very decorative wallpaper for Spartan condominiums. But don't eat it: it may cause cancer...