Word: flashman
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...independent state. Graham Greene saw Syrians controlling both the legitimate economy and the black market in his rendering of a British colony in West Africa. For Evelyn Waugh’s archetypical, if imagined, post-independence “Azania,” it was the Armenians. For Flashman, the eponymous troublemaker of George Fraser’s series of adventure novels, non-British collaborators (“colonized” persons themselves) were the fulcrum of imperial administration. Cowardly but lucky, Flashman collects his soldier’s pay, womanizes and drinks while subalterns took care of the Empire?...
...nonetheless determined to pitch their wares. I encounter a Rod Stewart look-alike in imitation snakeskin pants and a boating hat. Velcroed to his arm is a drop-dead gorgeous, svelte young Asian woman poured into a minuscule shiny black rubber dress. He introduces himself as "Flashman" (though when I encounter him a few hours and several beers later he fesses up to being Michael Schwartz from New York). His young charge is called Mirage and she is apparently a big star on a women's wrestling program called "Thunderbox." Or she would be if only he could get them...
...follow this odd couple's progress for a few minutes. Flashman trawls Mirage with him to the Studios USA stand (formerly Universal TV). There Flashman spots Maury Povich posing for cameras and offering pithy sound bites about the art of TV. Flashman sees the opportunity. He pushed Mirage towards the leathery-faced host and bellows out "Hey, Maury! You like Asian women! Whatcha think of her?!" Povich, who is, of course, married to TV anchor Connie Chung, shudders and moves away as rapidly as he can. I ask Flashman if his approach had perhaps lacked subtlety. "You gotta hustle...
...FLASHMAN AND THE DRAGON, George MacDonald Fraser THE GARDEN OF EDEN, Ernest Hemingway THE INHUMAN CONDITION, Clive Barker THE LAST BLOSSOM ON THE PLUM TREE, Brooke Astor MONKEYS, Susan Minot "Q" CLEARANCE, Peter Benchley...
...Flashman and the Dragon, eighth in the series of Flashman adventures and one of the saltiest, immerses him in the Taiping Rebellion, a nominally Christian uprising that lasted 14 years and resulted in some 20 million deaths. Based on a reputation for valor, acquired by stumbling into dangerous places at well-publicized times, the intrepid Flashman becomes Britain's semiofficial envoy to the revolutionaries. His escapades, both military and carnal, bring verve and wit to a carefully footnoted tale. Young Tom Brown was certainly more the gentleman, but he could not possibly have grown up to be so much...