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...about Natalie Portman, however, also points to a more troublesome feature of the Lampoon book: probably inadvertently, the writers forgot that more than half of entering college first-years are not heterosexual men. This is not surprising, given the Lampoon's demographics: only one of the nine editors who helped write the book last summer was a woman. Page 10: 'The life of a Math Teamer is paradise. Wake up, sleep through class, then go home and have sex with hot girls.' Parody of a National Honor Society charter, next page: 'If you see someone say something rude...

Author: By Alan E. Wirzbicki, CRIMSON STAFF WRITER | Title: Punch-less 'Poonster Parody | 9/22/2000 | See Source »

...recall correctly, nobody particularly liked it. The kids of Total Request Live never voted for it, it wasn't on heavy radio rotation, it wasn't cracking the Billboard charts. I heard it for the first time in July, thought it sounded like bad Venga Boys and forgot all about it. Well, tried to at least. The opening beats of the song--the duh duh thwack duh duh thwack--just lodged in my brain and I couldn't shake them. Well, apparently, neither could anybody else. With each successive listen, people suddenly caught onto Music and its giddy chorus about...

Author: By By SOMAN S. chainani, CRIMSON STAFF WRITER | Title: The Rebirth of Madonna | 9/22/2000 | See Source »

...apparently, someone forgot to pass the Clinton camp that memo. At a reception I happened to hear Norman Mineta, the U.S. Secretary of Commerce, say that if Gore were elected, "He hoped to be on for another four years." Interesting that one of the men in charge of the country doesn't realize that the last thing Gore wants around if elected is a former member of the Clinton administration--other than himself...

Author: By Christina S. Lewis, | Title: Confusion in Camp? | 9/21/2000 | See Source »

...plate. The assembly no doubt cheered and then marched back to the Fountain Inn for a sumptuous dinner, which included 16 toasts honoring just about anything in America the diners could dream up. It has recently been suggested that the participants grew so tiddly from the toasting that they forgot where they put the cornerstone. Though the Charleston newspaper story of 1792 suggested it was in the southwest corner, the truth is we do not know today which is the cornerstone. White House staff members of our era tried radar, X rays and even some noted dowsers to find...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: History: Action Central | 9/18/2000 | See Source »

...aboard the airliner "vote among themselves" to abandon the operation for lack of confidence in their own abilities, only seconds before their targets arrive. The snipers aren't in radio contact, haven't been preassigned targets, and are told that there are four rather than eight terrorists. And someone forgot to order up the armored cars for the final assault until 20 minutes after the shooting starts. The resulting debacle now becomes a tragicomic debacle, with German policemen shooting each other, and some two hours into the shootout the Palestinians kill all the hostages with a hand grenade and machine...

Author: /time Magazine | Title: Revisiting the Olympics' Darkest Day | 9/12/2000 | See Source »

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