Word: fortnum
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...years old, is a very curious American company. Long before many a U.S. corporation now active abroad was even organized, Heinz had important foreign sales. That early phase of the company's operation began the day in 1885 when Founder Henry Heinz walked into London's Fortnum & Mason, sold Britain's most prestigious grocer a line of Heinz horseradish, pickles, and ketchup. From that beginning, Heinz eventually established a thriving British company, ended up selling its 57 varieties in 150 nations. The company sold so well, in fact, that it pushed British per-capita annual consumption...
During that "glorious time of great too much," as Poet Leigh Hunt described an English Christmas, the groaning board of the rich and titled is customarily supplied by a unique emporium named Fortnum & Mason Ltd. Fortnum's is the world's only grocery with wall-to-wall carpeting, chandeliers and morning-coated clerks, who preside over stacks of specialty foods that can quickly run a grocery order to sky-high figures. Christmas accounts for 25% of Fortnum's business; last week 700 employees hustled to fill orders from eminent customers for such items as Beluga caviar...
...Quite So British. While all this seems quite traditional, the fact is that the Piccadilly store, dating back to 1707, is changing drastically under the direction of Garfield Weston (TIME, Oct. 26, 1962). Since the Canadian bread and grocery magnate (more than 700 stores in Britain) acquired Fortnum's in 1951, emphasis has shifted away from foods. Britain's bowler-hat and mink-coat contingent can now shop at Fortnum's for women's wear, men's clothing, leather goods, linens, even TV sets. A toy department offers miniature Rolls-Royces and hand-carved rocking...
Founded by Hugh Mason and William Fortnum, a footman to Queen Anne, the store has been, in fact, a running footnote to British history. Fortnum's supplied Wellington's officers with hams and butter during the Napoleonic Wars and shipped 250 Ibs. of concentrated beef tea to Florence Nightingale and her wounded in the Crimea. At home, Fortnum picnic hampers have always been de rigueur fare at Derby Day, Eton-Harrow cricket matches or an Oxford-Cambridge boat race. Dickens praised Fortnum's provender, and Benjamin Disraeli, after a hard day in Parliament...
Roasted Mac. Lord Fortnum of Alamein soon begins to fear that he is turning into a working-class flat in Paddington. Sure enough, he does. His new name is 29 Scum Terrace, W.2. A doctor examines him from the inside. Putting a stethoscope on a table, he says, "Cough." No. 29 Scum Terrace coughs, and a knob falls off a bureau drawer...