Word: fostering
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...VINCE FOSTER'S PHYSIcal appearance deteriorated. His weight had gone up as he'd responded to the pressures of the office by eating more junk food and exercising less, but now it dropped. He got a prescription for sleeping pills, but then refused to take them, saying he was afraid he'd become addicted...
...Peter Boyer, she recounts how she'd finally completed the move from Little Rock to Washington just as the travel-office controversy peaked, and Vince greeted her with the news that he thought he should resign. "You can't quit," she told him. "I just got here." Lisa called Foster's White House office frequently, asking his secretary, "How's he doing?" Deborah Gorham always said, "Fine," trying to maintain a professional distance, even though she too thought Foster was suffering from strain...
...July 11 Foster again complained to Lisa about the travel office, which he was convinced would lead to congressional hearings. He again said he intended to resign. Lisa suggested he write down what was bothering him. He should take the offensive, she said, and defend himself...
...Foster went upstairs. Taking a pen and a piece of yellow legal paper, he wrote down a series of thoughts about the previous few months, including his belief that no one in the White House had violated any laws in the travel-office firings. (The piece of paper would later be found in his briefcase, ripped into scraps.) The last item said, "I was not meant for the job or the spotlight of public life in Washington. Here ruining people is considered sport...
After the exercise, Foster's mood seemed to brighten. He said to Lisa, "I haven't resigned yet. I've just written my opening argument." As an "opening argument" ultimately intended for public consumption, however, the writings didn't mention all that was bothering Foster. Indeed, it seems plausible that what was most deeply troubling to Foster he couldn't mention to his wife, let alone put in writing...