Word: fred
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...child could predict what happens: Fred will learn the spirit of Christmas from his bro, and he'll use his street smarts to help Santa survive in the modern age. And if I were to tell you that, before going to the North Pole, Fred befriends a young black kid from an orphanage... But no, it's all too painfully predictable. Halfway through the movie, I gave up hoping it would display a modicum of logic, a sentence of sense, a subordinate clause of sanity. Besides, as Chico Marx so acutely observed, "There ain't so sanity clause...
...have a scenario for the never-to-be-made Fred Claus II: the elves unionize, realizing that they get paid even less than the 12-year-old Chinese girls who paint lead onto American kids' toys. If Willie and his pals were to call a work stoppage this Dec. 23, the labor movement could score its first quick victory in decades...
...kids' pillow only after the first tooth.) Conversion is the fate of every marplot in a movie like this. So Spacey, who played Lex Luthor in last year's Superman Returns, gets a Superman cape for Christmas. In-jokes and cross-marketing (the same company, Warner Bros., released both Fred Claus and Superman Returns) are about as sophisticated as this movie gets...
...Young Fred had been his parents' joy until little Nick came along. They immediately found constant fault with Fred, even as they cheered everything the baby did: giving away his presents to needier kids, jumping down a chimney, chopping down a fir tree that his big brother happened to be perched in. Momma Claus (Kathy Bates) is the same kind of ego-destroyer as Steve Carell's mother is in Dan in Real Life. Her ragging on Fred, while Nick becomes a hero to children every December, leads Fred to spectacular resentment.? In a scene that's way too "ouch...
...Fred is one of at least four movies this year - the others being Mr. Brooks, You Kill Me and Things We Lost in the Fire - that send the main character to an AA-type addiction meeting. This group here is Siblings Anonymous, and gets a few laughs from the appearance of underachieving brothers Frank Stallone, Stephen Baldwin and Roger Clinton. (I think I know where the members of the striking Writers Guild will be heading after their time on the picket line. They'll be attending a Siblings Anonymous meeting, when they're not at Children's Anonymous...