Word: frosh
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...spirit of pre-frosh, FM offers a similar list of trivial reasons why Harvard sucks. Read them, enjoy them, forget them--you'll be here next September...
This week, FM wonders what's in a name--"Rising Star: A Brand Name History," and the Endpaper by Vasugi V. Ganeshananthan. We resolve to find fame, be it brief, be it phony--Adam Taub becomes a precocious pre-frosh and Noah Oppenheim leads a troupe to New York City to hit the big time--all for the sake of Fifteen Minutes...
...frosh. You're probably going to get drunk and go to Tommy's tonight, but here's something you might want to tell your parents you did this weekend: heard the former president of Ecuador at a public address by Jamil Mahuad. Institute of Politics, 79 JKF St., Littauer Building, KSG. 495-1360, 4:30 p.m. FREE...
...First thing to consider when getting a pre-frosh is whether or not he/she is housebroken. When entering a vastly different environment, many pre-frosh will become confused and have accidents all over the place. Here is a time-worn technique for remedying the problem: Place a roll of toilet paper in the area where your pre-frosh first decides to do their business. Each day, move the roll closer to the common bathroom down the hall. Your pre-frosh should be able to find his/her own way within a week...
...Some people will tell you that it doesn't matter what you feed your pre-frosh. Not true! The proper nutrition and food texture is vital in maintaining your pre-frosh's natural sheen and sharp teeth. Beware of the dining hall's buffet-style setup, however. Pre-frosh tend to overeat when faced with such overabundance. Remember: You should be able to just make out your pre-frosh's ribs when they are in a resting state...