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...about this time in college when he caught and domesticated a toad. If you put a piece of rice paper on a toad and poke it, it will secrete a milky substance. Then you eat it off the paper—which, I’ll allow, sounds pretty goddamn nasty—and trip for a long time. Apparently what evolved as a deadly poison to most of nature’s predators provokes not-unpleasant hallucinations for humans. At least, this guy said so. I digress, perhaps, but my point is: toads are freaking sweet. I damn near...
...Twenty years ago I did Saturday Night Live in New York, and the bass player Tony gave me a cassette tape from a guy named Ned Sublette, and it was a song called Cowboys are Frequently Secretly (Fond of Each Other). And I thought it was the funniest goddamn song I'd ever heard. I had it on the bus for 20 years, and people would come in and I'd play it. When Brokeback come out, it just seemed like a good time to kick it out of the closet...
...really be ‘wrong,’ in the traditional sense,” I repeated to myself while crying over a toilet. “They’re merely misguided.” It was up to me to conquer my fear and buy a goddamn pair of leggings. Thus, I found myself in the dining hall, sporting leggings, a tunic, a pair of cowboy boots, obscene amounts of eyeliner and a massive chip on my shoulder. As I stuffed pasta into my mouth, I became more and more uncomfortable. The black thong was a mistake...
...Cutie"Crooked Teeth"With the miracle of the internet, music videos can now be seen on demand, day or night, for free (unless you use iTunes) by bigger audiences than ever before. But this is not as great as it seems: you must sit through the same goddamn shampoo commercial every goddamn time. The fact that I was able to enjoy the video for “Crooked Teeth” despite this critical setback, says a lot about the quality of the video. Director Ace Norton has accomplished something here: his combination of claymation and stop-motion video...
...Square on Winthrop Street, appeared unperturbed by the situation. “It’s pretty clearly not our fault,” he said, adding that he was surprised by the magnitude of the uniformed response. “It looks like they brought out the whole goddamn world to solve this.” Mary-Catherine Deibel, co-owner of the restaurant, said the driver was an employee of Ultimate Valet. “They’re very good,” Deibel said of the company. “They’ll take care...