Word: grader
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...rare occasions that Cohen does move beyond this tedium, the novel feels like something a fifth grader would write. When Santini arrives with his six-pack abs in Tiananmen Square, he kills several soldiers single-handedly, shoots down a helicopter with a handgun, and then proceeds to kick the rogue general in the balls. If this is the way our leaders see the world, is it any wonder that things are such a mess...
...Haunted Houses in 2006 by industry e-rag HauntWorld, the House draws crowds from around New England with its giant 30-foot monster scarecrow and massive pumpkin collection. It also features a website (http://www.hauntedoverload.com) that looks like it was made by a bored fifth grader in computer class circa 1995. Those hoping to find seasonal entertainment while avoiding long-distance travel can check out local haunt Spooky World. Located in Boston’s Bayside Exposition Center, Spooky World combines a cozy New England feel (there are still pumpkins and mansions) with the extravagance and spectacle of the urban...
...stone wall," Julie says. The family's transfer requests were denied because Thompson wouldn't reimburse the other district for the cost of teaching Luke. Meanwhile, at Berthoud Elementary, with one-on-one training and a trio of teacher's aides constantly at his side, the third-grader was advancing in such areas as writing the alphabet and using a computer mouse. But those skills had to keep being retaught, and Luke's parents regarded him as falling further behind. After hiring a therapist to observe Luke at school, the Perkinses learned that he was spending a lot of time...
...join the facebook group "Actually, Gordon Teskey Should Narrate in Middle English for the Rest of My Life." Most importantly, Teskey always boils texts down to what Harvard students pine after: sex. Just a few words from the Professor on the true nature of "spirit" would send any sixth grader into a fit of giggles. The reading varies from the light (Chaucer on flatulence) to the heavy (George Herbert on God), and the reading load is very well-paced. While the course does fulfill a Lit and Arts core, the majority of the people in the class are Humanities majors...
...moment of truth: Gordon Goodwin is a seventh-grader in Wichita, Kans. He listens to his first Count Basie record, The Queen Bee. Even though he has never heard Big Band jazz before, it hits him like something he has always known. He thinks, "That's it. That's going to be my life." And for the next three decades or so, it is--sort of. After studying music in college, he becomes a busy pianist, saxophonist and arranger at Disney theme parks and Hollywood studios, with a five-year interlude as musical director for Johnny Mathis. He wins three...