Word: grades
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...sure it was a fake Axl Rose. It's Axl's attempt to do Led Zeppelin's Kashmir. It's vaguely Middle Eastern and slow and bombastic and a little trippy. But it's boring. And why does it end with all those clips of Martin Luther King Jr.? Grade...
Track 5: Rhiad and the Bedouins This song, oddly, starts with him wailing almost exactly like Robert Plant in Kashmir. Then Axl sings really fast. Kind of a nicely sung and interesting chorus, but the rest of it sucks. Slash/Buckethead/Bumblefoot seems to get to do whatever they like. Grade...
...message is "You done me wrong, girl." It's not a bad song, but it's very serious about itself and a little boring at the same time. It sounds like if it had come out earlier, Michael Bay would have used it for the soundtrack for the Transformers. Grade...
Track 7: If The World Pretty good for a metal ballad. I can almost picture the hot, big-haired, leather-pants girls I went to high school with having sex to this. With me. Because I have Chinese Democracy. Grade...
...though as long as this road seems/ I know it's called the street of dreams/ But that's not stardust on my feet/ that leaves a taste that's bittersweet/ That's called the blues." Again, Axl thinks some woman he loved has turned into a real bitch. Grade...