Word: grassed
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Dates: during 1990-1999
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...KNOW HARVARD is big on tradition, and there is no more traditional time than Comencement. A nice, lush lawn for the robed seniors to trek across is probably as symbolically important as the butter pats on the Union ceiling. And anyway, the University would turn the grass iridescent yellow if it thought that would mean more alumni and parent donations...
...trying to downplay the importance of good grass. What would a Yard be without it? And green grass means healthy things growing, right? Warm weather, flowers, baseball, the Olympics, graduation...
...these days, the most unmistakable sign of summer is the sticky residue on every bald patch of open land in the greater Harvard area. Sure, the grass looks great now. But a month ago, any part of the Yard not under a building was drenched in blue-green chemicals. Harvard was like a gigantic poster child for the Rio conference...
...days, I'll bet the grass grew on its own. The Yardlings were all stately white guys who didn't play ultimate frisbee or football on the lawn. A bunch of Cliffies didn't dig up the middle of the Quad for a bonfire. And hundreds of tourists from Dubuque didn't kick up the sod chasing squirrels with bits of Au Bon Pain corn muffins...
...course, if there weren't any grass today, you'd all be sinking into the mud right now. But don't worry--even if it's raining, this newly replaced, chemically enhanced Grass Product won't go anywhere. Until about 2092, when it finally decomposes...