Word: harvardness
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This idiosyncratic functionality was pithily put into words by Harvard librarian Heather E. Cole, who, when asked about the library’s peculiar role as a social center, responded, “I think people make of Lamont what they need...
...library and the community it sustains emerge in response to the central anxiety of Harvard life: the failure to measure up. Under Lamont’s 24-hour fluorescent lighting, no one need bear this ponderous burden alone...
...going to miss this place. Almost nothing anyone told me about Harvard has been accurate. "You’ll be surrounded by attractive men who want to take you out to expensive meals and share your opinions about Proust!" "You will get on the Lampoon instantly, expending no effort!" "You will love the hot breakfasts!" "The person who lives in Natalie Portman’s old room will be easy to befriend and not think it’s weird when you come try to use her shower as a shrine...
...expectations were more specific. I always assumed that Harvard was a giant edifice made of red bricks and the bones of pilgrims, where my roommate would be named Quentin Compson and would leap off a bridge to his death shortly after meeting me. I was only half-right...
...thing that has puzzled me most in my time here is why most of the toilets lack lids, or whatever you call that thing that covers the seat. I have a private theory that whoever designed Harvard dorm furnishings had strong moral objections to people sitting down, which explains why all the chairs gang up on you whenever you try to lean back, but I don’t know why he would have wanted fecal coliforms all over everything in the restroom. Maybe he had one as a pet and got attached...